We are the rocks at the water’s edge. The water is the world constantly coming at us. Whether we feel as though the water is beating us down and making us small, or shaping and preparing us for what is yet to come, may be nothing more than a matter of perspective. Yet, from one moment to the next, it can feel like either. And sometimes, it can feel like neither. Sometimes, it feels like it’s coming at us with such persistently rushing force that the only thing to believe is that it is trying to drown us and wash us away completely.
And that’s the place I’ve been in for the past few months—convinced its goal was to obliterate me. Struggling with whether to give in and let it just take me away or to resist and hold strong.
So I’ve written squat on this happy, shiny blog. Because I wasn’t in a happy, shiny place and did not feel like I had anything to offer.
Coming Up for Air
The other day I was messaging one of my sisters, who is very insightful in her own right, and she brought up a point I had not considered—sharing my struggles could be just as helpful to others and could open a window to view things from a less attached perspective. Genius!
And also, not the first time she’s pointed me toward the light while I was drowning in darkness. (As a side note: if you are looking for more from life, Emilie offers coaching sessions and other courses. You can check out her site at [site removed]. This is not an affiliate link, but it is a *my sister is awesome* link!)
I walked away from that conversation with the seed of enlightenment she had gifted me and continued to ponder the possibilities.
The courage it takes to share your story might be the very thing someone else needs to open their heart to hope. —Unknown
If you have been here before, you may recall that I’ve somewhat recently written about seeds (Why It’s Time to Stop Banking on Someday, July 2020) and I’ve since come to genuinely love both the term and the concept.
Paddling Back to Shore
It’s no secret that life is hard. Not everything is going to work out the way we plan, or hope, or dream. Many of us find ourselves working not only to combat all of life’s external distractions, but countless internal ones as well.
My biggest internal battles are anxieties and depression. So it’s no wonder I opted for a happy, shiny blog to push out a little more love, understanding and encouragement into the world—things I feel like I need more of in my life.
And when it seemed like my entire world came crashing down around me, I let myself get lost inside my head. I gave in to the water’s current and let it do with me as it saw fit. I believed I deserved nothing more.
But I do deserve more. So do you. We all deserve more. It was in that moment of accepting that I realized the water’s intent was not to obliterate, but to cleanse.
Returning Home
Some days it can feel like there is nothing at all worth fighting for, but there is. There always is. It just takes looking at it from beyond ourselves to see things as they really are, without the heavy drapes of despair and judgement blocking the view.
So open the windows. Let in the light and the fresh air. Close your eyes and allow it to wash over you. Breathe it in, deep. Exhale slowly. And when you open your eyes again, notice how everything seems just a little brighter, a little bolder and so much lighter.
The rushing forces of water I feared would be my demise are the very same that returned me safely home, cleansed and renewed, ready to face life’s next adventure.
Insomuch as it was an ending, it was the birth of a new beginning. And for that, I am grateful.
Best to all,
